Heart in the Throat

In a quest to keep myself floating, I tried to ask people out with me. First i tried Huimin but she wants to go dinner with Eri and Honey lemon. Then i tried rz and she agreed to go coffee with me.. Thank you. i really appreciate it... :) And i have alan who is going to accompany me to this Aussie education fair. Sometimes u need people to push u forward.

And i went jogging.

And i took my dinner.

And i packed my schedule for the next few days.

And i tried calling Jen in Aussie and i went into the mail box for 3 times with the all familiar voice."Hi, Jennifer here! I will call you back as soon as possible. Thanks!" Think Jennifer has this soothing voice going on.

in a complication

Yesterday i decided to face the truth. End of last year i really feel so tired of the kind of everything and i decided to stop doing everything and try applying to MOE. So I stopped SIM for 6 months. And i applied MOE for don know how many times and didn't get a reply. So i told God "One last time, if i didn't get in to even the 4 years course, it means that it was all not meant to be. And if this place is not a place You want me to be in, close the door completely coz i don want to go to the wrong place." And so i started all the waits...

yesterday i decided i should just call MOE and not wait for the letter and tada.... i got rejected. Mixture of emotions. Of coz i am sad and down and every word you can think of when u r in the valley but at the same time i was thinking at least i know this door is really closed for me coz i really really tried all ways... Oh well i can say with all the retrenchments going on, there are definitely a lot of good people applying with me at the same time but still i believe if it is meant to be it will be.

Arg. so what now? continue w SIM? i hate this kind of thinking game. Jen, how?

But still i think i will try again. coz i really want that cert and that experience...

the jacket

I wanna get this kind of jacket!!!!
i think the first 3 r nice.. :)

RomansChapterEightVerseTwentyEightSays....

Rom 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

I was reading Audacity of Hope and this verse came into my mind. I was on the part whereby the author came across a claim that while in the state legislature he voted against a bill to "protect our children from sex offenders." Of course he was like "what the...???" However someone said to him "Anyway, cheer up, I'm sure this will help you with the sex offender vote."

AND that's how Rom8:28 came to my mind. Yah. All things will somehow work together for those who love God. :) Even if u can't see that it is working. Romans is one of my favourite books in the Bible.

My weekend...:)

Night out on Thurs with twins wj and bl... I ordered this Hoegaarden Forbidden Fruit... look at the glass. I like it... It is Adam offering Eve a glass of something. :)

Looking at the picture on the glass closely.... cute?

And Sunday... we went to a wedding and the lovely Xingni caught the flower.. So she is going to get married next!!! And it is purple flower... :) and on and on Kelvin kept reminding me that i am not young anymore... duh... i will get married before 30. To a good man. and be very happy.

And off we go to Vivo to hang out... HOT day so i decided to abandon my all time food latte and have this all time fattening ice blended something...

Trying to cam-whore.

And the 2 of them joined in... Alan looks like a mushroom. no Mario. i always like pictures with alan popping out from somewhere coz he has the most interesting facial expression. haha... I love alan.

Sunday ended with visiting a new Bar beside SIM... Halo Bar or something. They serve good beer with games like soccer table, and the shooting game whereby the arrow has to hit the centre (forgot what is it called.. Rueyzhen will be laughing @ me), pool, k... etc. New hang out place... :)

Pastor was taking bout beign forgiving and forgetting and moving on. But really sometimes we get stuck in a trench and couldn't get out and watch people moving on with their life with us sulking at the corner. One thing that i ask of God is that i will be more forgetful. Ah... My manager is right. Emotion is a prize for women but can be our greatest enemy too. Let me choose to forgive and forget and be someone with a BIG heart, someone who always move to greater heights. :)

A cuppa plain latte which never fail to make me happy! :) I can't wait to try Melbourne latte. Whenever i drink lattes, i will think of Jennifer!

Haven been blogging for quite sometime was really busy with work! And i was like "Phew...!!!" it's Labour Day = Long weekend = going out = sleep = long jog = chill and book and latte... And i received a sms that we r having external audit next week. There goes my weekends.. ARG...so Xingni, you r definitely not alone working hard.. :)

Being in the ministry for 6 years, you start to appreciate people more. Especially those who walk with you even through the fire. Even when u r in the valley somehow they trust you although you have bruises everywhere and really look pathetic and cannot make it. There are people who come, there and people who go and it is through time when loyalty is tested and proven. There are people who always feel that you haven done enough to help them but they never spare a though to ponder on this question "how can i help MYSELF". There are people who are so so independant that they refuse the help of others.